Can an awkward angry bitter lonely woman learn how to be beautiful on the inside and if so, what are the specific steps one can take?

Answer by Raakhee Venugopal:

Thank you for the A2A.

Short answer : Yes, she can.

Long answer:

At the outset, it’s very important to understand and evaluate the various factors that makes the person that way. Is it the result of some childhood trauma that refuses to go away? Is it some recent emotional shock? It could be anything. If the person does not want to talk to anyone about it, they should be asked to have a conversation with themselves about this. I do this all the time when my mind is disturbed. My conscience is one of my best friends. There are a few questions I usually ask myself…

  1. Is this event/incident going to affect my life five years later?
  2. Does my life depend on it? As in, is this a do or die situation?
  3. Will my brooding over it change anything?

99% of the time, the answer is NO. Once they arrive at that answer, half the job is done.

One of the best ways to calm a stormy mind is to embark on a trip. Go to someplace that will take the person out of their current surroundings, away from familiar people, away from situations that would bring back unwanted memories. By traveling, I did not mean to travel like this…

This is traveling as a recreation.

To ease an unsettled mind, traveling should be more like this…

Travel to relatively uncommon ‘tourist destinations’. Being an Indian myself, I would definitely recommend INDIA.

I have been told by many people that traveling to India has been a truly rewarding experience for them – emotionally and spiritually.

Meet new people. See how very ordinary people find happiness in the simplest of things. Share a slice of life with them.

By the time they return, they will find themselves to have transformed into a totally new person.

If they’re unable to travel, the next best thing to do would be to spend as much time as they can with children. Volunteering at an orphanage would be a wonderful idea.

Image : Thornwell Home for Children

Interacting for a long time with children can have really amazing effects on the overall emotional intelligence levels of a person. Children are innocent and guileless…completely opposite to the bad world we are all trying to protect ourselves from. Remember that these children are growing up without the warmth and affection of a family of their own. To know that they have someone to care for them (besides their caretakers) would make them so happy. And trust me, a child’s happy innocent laugh is one of the most infectious thinsg ever ^_^

Some people get the same satisfaction when they spend time with old people…especially the ones who have been ruthlessly deserted at Old-Age homes or Retirement homes.

Most of these people who are already in the sunset of their lives are often ignored with no visits by their loved ones and hardly anyone to talk to. It’s like they have been just left there to speand their lives until they die. What they crave the most at this point of their lives is human interaction. Some love and care. A few kind words. Somebody to listen to them and their stories. There is a Dutch nursing home that allows students to stay for free with the elderly residents and they say that the change they have seen in the moods of the residents is nothing short of amazing! (Dutch nursing home lets students live free)

I guess the only way to spread happiness and beauty within yourself is to make a conscious effort to spread it outside yourself first. The inner glow would automatically come as a result ^_^

Good luck!

Can an awkward angry bitter lonely woman learn how to be beautiful on the inside and if so, what are the specific steps one can take?



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